(Don’t) Eat This: Feast of the Three Kings At Epcot’s International Festival of the Holidays

Ah. My review of the Feast of the Three Kings Kitchen.

Wherein I at least build trust in showing you that I am always honest and most certainly not just drinking the Kool Aid.

Truth be told, if I wasn’t in the habit of reviewing everything for you guys, I would have skipped this one. It was one of the first Holiday Kitchens I tried this season and have been sitting on it since because I hate writing about things that I didn’t love when there’s so, so much here that’s wonderful. My pictures aren’t even good since I ate it at night and didn’t have anyone with me to assist with lighting, but they are what they are since (as you might already have guessed) I doubt I’ll be back – unless it’s to get the rum spiked tropical eggnog (whoa, right?!) that I missed on this first visit.

The Feast of the Three Kings booth is in Showcase Plaza near the walkway to Future World. The foods here honor Three Kings Day, a holiday celebrated in Spain, Latin America, and the Caribbean. You’ll find 4 food items there (in addition to one of the cookie stroll cookies), three savory and one sweet.

• Pastelón: Sofrito-marinated Beef with Sweet Plantains and Olives (Gluten/Wheat-Friendly) ($5.00)

If you’re going to get anything at this booth, make it this (or the rice pudding). It’s ugly as can be but has that holiday spiced beef taste that makes me think of this time of year. While I wish I tasted more plaintain and olive (both of which I love – and, while they’re both in there, they’re not prominent) this is still tasty enough.

• Queso Fresco-stuffed Arepa topped with Shrimp, Crushed Avocado Aji and Tomato Sauce (Gluten/Wheat-Friendly) ($5.75)

I was so excited to try this since I’m a huge fan of shrimp and avocado but this just missed the mark for me. I don’t know off hand what type of avocado they used, but it tasted a bit more like green ones which, at least to me, lack the creamy nutty flavor of their black counterparts. The tomato sauce was just that – more sauce than salsa – and the shrimp was, at least in my batch, a bit fishy. And nobody likes a fishy shrimp. All in all, as you can probably guess, honestly the most forgettable thing I’ve eaten at the Festival of the Holidays.

• Arepas topped with Melted Queso Fresco (Vegetarian, Gluten/Wheat-Friendly, Kid Friendly) ($4.50)

Most forgettable other than, perhaps, these. I’m so used to Epcot’s Brazilian Cheese Bread and honestly dug into these expecting a similarly chewy, cheesy amazingness – but they are corn rather than tapioca-based (as arepas are, I know, I know…) and the queso fresco was just a bit dry sitting on top.

• Tres Leches Rice Pudding with Pumpkin Seeds (Gluten/Wheat-Friendly) ($4.25)

This is a simple little thing but honestly pretty tasty and, along with the pastelón, one of the things perhaps worth trying here. The rice pudding is pretty simple but good and the pumpkin seeds really do add a lovely texture. It’s a tiny dish for $4.25, but I can’t fault the taste.

I’ll probably head back just to try the rum topped tropical eggnog – but for now? Feast of the Three Kings? Check!